Animal Corner (yeah, yeah, front page stuff a while back...)

One Flu Over the Cuckoo's Nest

Having realised that swine flu is not really much worse than ordinary flu (except in the Third World/credit-card-healthcare USA) and unlikely to solve the looming pensions crisis, the government seem determined to lose a few older people in a panic-induced stampede for unnecessary medication kept behind unreasonable security.

Pigs to sheep, and "Shaunetta" the sheep, trapped part way down a cliff has been shot by the RSPCA after 10 days on its ledge. People are in uproar, but the charitable animal savers have assured the public that it was for the best.

It was a sheep! It was bred and raised to be shaved then eaten. If it had been winched down by the full might of the Royal Marines helicopter boarding squads it would have still been shaved and eaten afterwards. If people are getting squeamish about shaving and eating fellow mammals, there are millions more in just as much need of rescue from baldness and ingestion.

After 10 days of watching little mutton chops on a cliff face, the RSPCA men probably just got hungry...

gobbyryder is at hotmail.co.uk